Classes

Here I am at home. It's very nice. A little cold, but other than that, very nice. I get exhausted extremely easily, which is irksome to me. I can't do as much with my days, which is even worse. I have a to do list which spans two post-its and today I've been able to check off maybe four things. Unacceptable.

Moving on. Dave Berque might be nothing short of amazing. He has been helping me out so much and just checking to see how I'm doing in general which is the sweetest thing he could possibly do! Class today pretty much wiped me out, so I'm hoping that a two hour class tomorrow isn't going to floor me.

Need more pain meds.

Painkillers are my friends

I got discharged from the hospital today and I'm now at home. Finally I can get a full nights sleep!

Painkillers are my friends

I got discharged from the hospital today and I'm now at home. Finally I can have a full nights sleep!

Painkillers are my friends

I got discharged from the hospital today and I'm at home now. Finally I can get a full nights sleep!

To Do: 11/18

• Move
• CS 296 Paper
• Study for OR
• Pack for Monday/Tuesday/etc.
• Get Jell-O
• Get low-sodium chicken broth (thanks Bryan!)
• Do all backlogged Comp Org HW
• WiCS Budget with Malisa

My Life is full of stuff and I think I like it that way.

I'm trying to think about what to write about today. Quick recap of my day: went to Great Harvest, a small child serenaded my family with Ariel's Lament from The Little Mermaid; it was fabulous! Went to Artist's Own, fell in love with a piece by Terry Duncan called Cutting Corners. It's colorful and sparkly and it has circles which are my favorite shape. Got Christmas tree ornaments from Glass Roots for Mom to take with her when she's traveling the first two weeks of December. Funny conversation:
Me: Why don't you get star or snowman ornaments, they're so non-denominational?
Mom: Erin, I'm going to Ireland.
Me: Oh, right...well, nevermind. Let's go with Christmas trees. I wonder if they have any virgins...

Also stocked up on rolling pins which my parents use as wedding presents. My French horn teacher's husband is a genius when it comes to woodwork and his pieces are just gorgeous. I always feel warm and fuzzy inside after we buy something from Artist's Own. I think I like supporting local aritsts and I like pretty stuff. Good reasoning.

Then it was off to Best Buy where they no longer carry what I wanted, but Amazon.com does, so I can still my geeky present for all my geeky friends. Mom and I did get a USB turntable for Dad for Christmas, which will be spectacular! Can't wait! I think I'll have Mom bring it in while I'm in the hospital and I'll mess around with it and start to write an intense instruction book for Dad.

Moving on to Victoria's Secret where I realized my mother and I have generation gap issues. 2 new bras which are spectacularly cute and new underwear because we all know I need that so badly and a free tote bag! Whee!

Then home for about an hour and a half and then off to a Purdue Women's Basketball game! Love women's basketball. Kathleen gave me socks and a hopeful card. It was adorable! Win against Butler.

Need to get Thank You cards.

I've come to realize I'm at a really good point in my life right now. I like where I'm at, I like what I'm doing, and I like whom I'm with. It makes me happy that I'm an honest person and not fake. I know this because I like all of my friends. If you don't like your friends, something's wrong and you aren't being yourself. Always, after conversations with my friends I think about how much I like them. Example: I talked to Haley tonight...I love talking to Haley. She always makes me happy and feel good. Even if my overall mood is shitty and she just lets me be shitty, it's good. And I feel like I get this good feeling from all of my friends because I'm hardly ever pretending with them which makes me supremely happy.

My mom used the word dispondent today. It made me smile on the inside.

I wonder if I get an AT&T Wireless card, that supposedly can find internet access in a hole and a lake, I'll get internet in the hospital. I don't think I can go for 5-7 days without it. It could get ugly. I think I'll go try to find my knitting stuff I have here at home. I hope I didn't throw it out.

Assignment Statements??

salsa = good
moving day = bad
Monday = bad
Nerd Factor = through the roof;

My Roommates Are Music Students

Today I was much less productive than yesterday, which is sad.
Productivity Review

• did laundry
• went to class and paid attention
• responded to Katy Teats (finally!!!)
• watched House
• compiled my Holiday Card List
• looked over org test to determine what problems I need to review
• decided to go into Harms' office hours tomorrow
• signed up with FastWeb for scholarships and internships (have yet to apply for either)
• returned Lauren's notebook
• decided I want to go to Best Buy and Victoria's Secret on Saturday

Obviously yesterday was way better as far as things that actually matter go. Sad sad.

Moving on, I checked my schedule for this spring and I got all my classes that I wanted!!! Whoopie! I'm so happy. That will take care of group 6 and I'll start two minors! After this semester I'll be done with another minor. Happy happy day!

I think that's all for right now. I've had a lot going through my head about future plans. Stuff like where I want to end up, what I want to accomplish, and how I see things going in a couple years. It's been weird. I know I'll change, but I can't think of myself as any other way but how I am right now. So I'm picturing future situations with the current me even though it won't be the current me. And if I picture change, it's not necessarily the change that will happen or the change that I want to happen. grr?

No Title, don't want to think

I feel I was very productive today. I went to class. I copied notes from days I missed. I helped Jesse with homework. I wrote Thank You Cards. (I forgot to go to Wal-Mart, will do tomorrow). I did another in-class example from Data Structures and I attempted one of the programming exercises, which didn't go well. I responded to my missed discussions for CS296 Can Computers Think? I brainstormed some arguments for my upcoming CS296 paper about the human race and their fear of robots and intelligent machines. I wrote a project outline that I can start implementing for the Linux Project. I organized a shelf for myself in the CS Lounge. I went to chapter. I went to an ACM Officers meeting to help plan their Hardware Presentation (still a little bitter about it, but I'm going to go with it and use it a jumping point *soul cleansing*). And now I'm going to try to get 8 hours of sleep.

Hopefully tomorrow can be just as productive!!

Internet = Life Essential

I'm very happy to be back to doing things. I have a to do list all ready for me to tackle and homework that's just waiting to be finished! Isn't it exciting?!? OK, while you may not find it all that exciting, I'm quite content with being busy and riduculously scheduled.

I'm currently very upset about my linux os and I would like it off of my computer. It's not recognizing my wireless card and I've followed instructions, so I'm a little peeved about it. Any os is rendered completely useless to me if there is no internet.

Thankfully my parents seem to be in support of my building my technology book collection. This means they get to go to Borders with me and sit in the technology section for a really long time while I look at books they have no clue about and then I get to try to explain it to them and they wind up even more confused. Book life is good. Linux life is bad. Post-it life is good. Figuring out summer life is bad.

How Things are Going...

Things are just going right now. The sun keeps rising everyday and I keep getting up for some reason, which I'm hoping will become apparent to me very soon because I could really use a reason.

Things that are going well:

• Post-its
• Jesse, Malisa, and Ashley
• the gateway mouse
• driving
• CS 296 Can Computers Think?
• Data Structures, pg. 717 #13
• Movies

Things that aren't going well:

• Linux
• PHP, Apache, MySQL
• Vista
• XWin Logon Server
• Data Structures
• Comp Org
• Bryan (not that we aren't going well, I'm just having difficulties and it's bad.)
• Appendix
• Microsoft Office 2007
• ASP
• Websites
• Best Buy
• Sleeping
• My family
• My desk
• Wheaties hat

I think that about covers it. Unfortunately, my bad list far outweighs my good list, which is bad. I'm a wreck. I need time off, but I've already involuntarily taken time off and I have enough to deal with from that as it is. Maybe I just need to be busy again so that every day I'm scheduled all day and then every night I will be so exhausted that I won't have time to think about things and I'll fall to sleep immediately. Then perhaps while I'm being so schedule some of the things from the bad list will fix themselves, well, I'll fix them, just at a scheduled time. And maybe then I'll stop being emotional and crying and breaking down everytime I have to go to bed. God damn it.

Things just aren't good for me right now and I don't know how to make them better. I don't how I can make them better. I want to start over.

Appendix

So, last Saturday was my sorority formal. It didn't go so well. Virtually right after dinner I started feeling sick and by 10:30 I was vomitting in the bathroom. Of course, I figured it was

Sparkly Pants

I think things are good. They might be bad, but right now they're good and I can't tell the difference. Maybe I'm jealous. I think that's it. I want that. Period. And I can't have it. I brought it up and never got an actual answer and I was never satisfied with the whole thing. But that's just how my life goes, isn't it?

kind of disgusting. ulgh.

BUT...IT'S A GOOD DAY. REALLY.