2/29/08

First and foremost, Happy Leap Day!

*Pants I wanted to wear: check
*Interview: check
*Financial Aid: check
*Spanish: check
*Comp Org: check
*Lunch:
*Pack:
*Phone Interview:
*Nordstrom (Naughty Monkey, wedge heels):
*Home:

2/27/08

I love my friends. This is, of course, a silly statement since if I didn't love them, we wouldn't be friends. But it's not living together or spending hours on end together that's so important. It's the little interactions that happen on a day-to-day basis that make me smile and thankful that my friends are in my life. This morning I saw Jesse on my way to class and we stopped to chat for no more than 20 seconds, but that made my entire morning. It was just easy, not forced or not fishing for things to talk about. Haley called today and she's doing really well which makes me so proud of her! We talked for about 10 minutes, just enough time to check in and see how each of us doing. I truly love how we've kept in touch. And we still matter to each other! She always cares about what I'm doing and I always care about how she's doing. It's the little things we tell each other, like how I'm planning on going to Plainfield tonight or how she practices nursing stuff on Noah; stuff that we'd know about each other if we lived in the same city.

Today little interactions make things worthwhile.

2/26/08

Some things are going really well in my life right now. Internships for example. I've had two phone interviews, one with Vera Bradley and one with Eli Lilly, and I need to schedule another one with Crowe for sometime this week or early next week. On Thursday is the DePauw Career and Internship fair, which I'll hopefully get some interviews at as well. Also on Thursday, I'm interviewing at ExactTarget. Next Wednesday I'm interviewing for an application development position at J.D. Byrider. Next Thursday I'm doing the on-campus interviews for Eli Lilly. Today I finally officially applied for the Eli Lilly internship online. *Since taking HCI, I loathe filling out forms that are poorly designed.*

We turned in the housing contract. I think it went really well. Porter has some concerns, but I can't think of anyone else to live with us that will be here on campus. I truly think it will be fine and that his concerns are a little unnecessary. Given this is college so you want to do everything you want, but sometimes you won't live with people that you know. Plus, he knows Jesse, he knows Ashley, we've met on multiple occasions, he and Malisa have met in more than one sober social situation, and he's had class with Curlee. I'm just not sure how he would feel like a sixth wheel. I don't understand why Jesse wouldn't at least talk to him and tell him we want to live with him. Yes, we need six people for group living, but he seems rather normal and I'm sure he's really fun. I don't think everyone understands that if one person pulls out, then we don't get group living. It's a very delicate situation and I wish Jesse had done something about like said to Porter, "Well how about we all go out to dinner as an informal get-to-know-you type thing?" Overall, I'm really excited about the group living. Dave wrote a beautiful letter and I'm really looking forward to living with everyone.

As far as school goes...hahaha. I hate writing petitions and I wish the Academic Petitions Committee would stop making me jump through hoops. I need to go get my professor's signatures tomorrow for everything. It would be so much easier if my original petition went through. I started working on my Data Str. project tonight. I think it'll go just fine. I think I'm flat out screwed in AI, I feel like everything is way over my head. I need to really focus while I'm in class. Last class I didn't do anything but listen to the lecture and I understand it much better, surprise. Scott has a voice that is easy to drift in and out from. Spanish is going pretty well. I'm really good at grammar, which is nice. I dropped French, I hated it, and golf. I didn't want to drop golf, but Comp Org meets at the same time and I'm hoping the Petitions Committee will approve my extension so I can sit on the class and then finish it at the end of second semester. I really love my free weights class though. I love having that time actually in my schedule to work out! I think I'll take another PE class, but only if it's with Bonnie. She is so funny!

I'm really excited to see Bryan (and everyone else!) this weekend. I feel slightly awkward about it though since we've gotten into so many fights over the phone without seeing each other. BUT things aren't awkward unless we make them awkward and I don't either one of us has any desire to do that, so I'm pretty sure everything will be fine.

I've been thinking and I have all these random ideas in my head of things to make and design and I've decided that I need to start drawing them out. I'm not a great drawer, so I'll just have to work on that. It'd be nice to have to remember all my ideas in my head and have them on paper so I can sift through them as I like.

I think that's probably enough for tonight. I'm going to bed...before midnight. This is just unheard of!!

2/25/08

The bitchy weird feeling left last night right after I fell in love with the CS Department, again. Thank goodness.

Thanks Bryan for telling me to get over it and just start checking things off of my to do list. And sorry for calling so early, I just remembered you had said you were working earlier this week.

So, now I'm going to hopefully do something productive and attempt not to be so angry that I take it on others.

2/24/08

OK, I'm going to edit this post later because I'm feeling weird about things and I really want to bitch about them. I just don't have time to do it right now. Grr. I want to sleep more.

Mainly I just wanted to write a quick post. I still need to design my free weight machine tracker thing. It would just make going to the gym so much easier. No more walking around with silly pieces of paper. That would be nice. Warm fuzzies. I think I'll see if Ashley, Malisa, or Jesse want to watch a movie tonight; I have some rentals at Blockbuster.

My mom "yelled" at me yesterday about the Target card. I wish I was a better daughter.

2/22/08

*great idea for an electronic tracking weight system. Sometime I'll actually write it out.

Stardust...me gusta.

"They say it's the biggest is all of Stormhold!"

2/18/08

I need to sleep. Last night was a huge mistake, albeit a productive one. Today was full of hard decisions, albeit necessary ones.

I truly hope that I have clean clothes or at least something to wear to class tomorrow and Wednesday. I've run out of room in my planner to write anything on today and tomorrow. I think Wednesday is better, but not for long as I just thought of something I need to put in there. Plus, I have a feeling Thursday is going to fill up very soon after that. Good thing I use those color felt-tip pens that make my planner pages so fun to look at! I think I'll throw some stickers on it tonight.

For a Better America

http://www.forabetteramerica.org/

A site co-started by one of Jamie's friends. Even though, let's face it, over half the people who actually read this are probably already a part of it. Please sign up, the guys behind the site have given this a lot of work. And make me your chum. My username is ed.

2/13/08

Sometimes I'll stop focusing on what I'm working on and my mind will wander into pain. I think of how it must feel to have you father die. Just gone. Even if you've been preparing for it. And then I realize how fun Bob was. I can't remember one single thing he said word for word, but he always commanded attention. He was charismatic and funny. He was the kind of person we need more of in the world, not less. When I think of myself losing someone like that, it hurts. My heart truly hurts. It tingles, in an awful not quite unbearable uncomfortable way. In such a way, that if I could, I would rip it out just so it would stop. The tingling makes it feel like my heart is moving in my chest, like it's banging against me wanting to break free and not feel it anymore because it's so much. It's going to slam me against a wall and my breastbone will break open and I'll scream in so much pain and it's all going to flow out of me in a gigantic almost never-ending stream of steaming black liquid. And then I'll be ok, maybe.

And there's Jim. I didn't get to see him last Sunday when my parents visited while they were in Chicago for the Purdue Women's game. My dad says Jim knew then that he was dying. When I think about it, my breath gets quick and shallow and everything hurts again and it's all I can do to not yell that pained yell of loss. I last saw him over the summer at his birthday party. It was fabulous, a real shindig. He was happy and with family and his friends, all the people that meant the most. He was always Big Jim. I hate seeing his sons sad. All of them are and were so full of life and fun. Always up for an adventure. The support of the family is impressive and so needed. Dad's family is always there for times like this. They've taught me family is always more important. You always come for family. It doesn't matter what else is going on, you're family which means you're always there.

2/10/08

To Do: 2/10

• E-mail Ellen, Kathleen, G4G, Claire, Rebecca, Katy
• French Reading, Homework, Writing
• Spanish (Friday and Monday)
• Golf (Friday and Monday, e-mail Sarah and Brittany for Monday assignment)
• AI, look at new homework and programming project
• Summer cover letters
• HCI, reading?
• PHP project
• WiCS
• ACM Prep

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tzq3srbYEUY

drops

such a tragedy. truly awful. so many tears and shaking sobs.

I <3 the CS Dept.

Sometimes things really suck. And I like to say cliche phrases such as "I hate my life." I usually take that back as soon as I've said it, since I know it's not true. I truly love moments that happen when I get to sya things like "I love my life." It's even better when that moment is brought on by something out of my control. I get warm fuzzies.

2/4/2008

I'm just around. Last night may or may not have been a little or a lot crazy. Continuing to be productive. Woo hoo. No recent insights into my personality or life. Or at least none that I really want to share.

2/2/08

Hmm...still cranky. Life really hasn't helped with that. On the plus side, I can always count on my mom. She doesn't always take my side on things, so I know that when she does, I have a legitimate point. French is hard. But really just the reading, speaking, writing, listening, and understanding part. Which I think takes care of all of it.

I need to write out a giant to-do list and truly break things up into small parts so I don't feel so daunted and intimidated when I look at stuff. And I need to get together all my binders. They keep me nice and organized, yay.